When I first became a stay-at-home mom, I had difficulty managing my time and often found myself very sad and drowning in tasks at the end of the day. I never prioritized self-care and made sure my needs were met. I constantly spent the time my son was sleeping just mindlessly scrolling on my phone and feeling depressed at the end of the day.
After about 6 -8 months I started developing a routine/schedule and it drastically improved my mood. If any of the things I did above are relatable, then this post is for you.
How did I develop a rhythm as a stay-at-home mom?
It took me a very long time to get through my depression in the first few months of being a stay-at-home mom. Then as soon as I was feeling better and getting into a routine, the apartments we were living in became dangerous and we had to break our lease and move in with my mom.
My family of 3 and all of our staff are now crammed in my medium-sized childhood bedroom. My outer world was chaos and I guess you can say that caused my mind to be chaos. Not only did I start a family then immediately needed to move back in with my mom… My home was also a mess and I felt like a failure.
After 3 months of living with my mom, I started to gain a little more skip in my step. I was finally getting used to my living situation and my son’s little personality was really shining.
The most important thing I did for myself and to help me start my journey of changing my life was to prioritize my mental health.
About 2-3 months of my healing journey was spent working on my mental health.
I didn’t prioritize the house, organizing & decluttering my stuff, or hunting for my next place to live. I spent those months alone with my thoughts and working on a better and happier me. Being a stay-at-home mom can be very isolating and depressing without a routine.
Eventually, I got to the point where I needed a little more structure in my life. I started slowly cleaning up my space so I could have a calm mind. I started planning my day/week regularly and giving myself grace if I didn’t have the best day.
Now I’m to a point where I’m pretty satisfied with my little routine and I find it helps give me fulfillment. Of course, I’m not perfect. There are days when I’m still struggling with my depression and anxiety. Times when my schedule and routine absolutely go out the window and I wing it. But overall I keep going back to this routine as a stay-at-home mom.
Rules I set for myself
I am very hard on myself and will often beat myself up mentally if I’m disappointed in myself. I’ve had to come up with rules for myself so that I don’t fall into a mental spiral.
- Only pick 2-3 important tasks for the day. (have an extra list of less important tasks on hand in case the 2-3 are completed and you want to do more)
- It’s okay if you didn’t finish everything on your list. You’re not allowed to beat yourself up.
- Tomorrow is a new day and a new opportunity to do better
- It’s okay to tweak your schedule until you’re satisfied
- Prioritize eating over any tasks that need to be done.
- Times do not need to be exact (sh** happens)
Stay-at-home mom schedule
This schedule is based on my current schedule with my 13-month-old. This schedule can vary day to day of course, but this is what it looks like on average.
7 am Wake Up
7:30 am Breakfast and morning routine
8:30 am Activity (outside, learning activity, puzzle, etc.
9:30 Snack
10-11 am Nap (momma time)
12 pm Lunch
1 pm independent play (clean or do anything that needs to be done during this time)
2 pm Snack and tv time
3 pm Nap (momma time)
4 pm Snack and outside time
5-6 pm Dinner
6:30 pm Quiet playtime
7 pm Bedtime routine
7:30 pm In bed (momma time)
10 pm Bedtime routine
Like I said before this schedule varies day to day. I honestly think that once you have kids you have to realize that sometimes your plan goes totally out the window. Kiddos are unpredictable so it’s important to give yourself grace on hard days.
What I do during “Mommy time”
When my son is sleeping I like to take time to do whatever I need to do. I try to avoid scrolling on social media because I find I don’t mentally recharge when I’m looking at social media.
The best time to get anything done is when your kiddo is sleeping. As soon as my son is asleep I do something important for my mental and physical health and make the most of the time. Sometimes my son sleeps 30 mins, but you’d be surprised how much you get done when your phone is put away.
Things that I do to give myself a boost during my son’s sleep windows:
*Eating
*Self-care
*Nap
*Shower
Yoga
Writing
Planning
Budgeting
Cleaning
Exercising
Meal prep
Read
Watch tv
Working (I work on my blog or youtube channel)
All of the options with a star by it are essential tasks. These are very important to keep you mentally healthy. These recharge you mentally and help you be the best momma you can be for your babies!!
Prioritize these tasks before any other tasks when needed. Cleaning is essential too. However, I find that if I spend every single nap cleaning I don’t mentally recharge and it makes me snap at my husband when my sons had a hard day which isn’t fair.
Patience and mental wellness are important as a parent!! Use those naps wisely.
How does this stay-at-home mom schedule help me?
When I first became a mom I didn’t have a schedule at all. I was extremely depressed so I never had the motivation to do anything productive.
Hours were spent watching TikTok or scrolling through social media when my son slept- which was often! I was trying to avoid my feelings with the dopamine I got from social media.
At the end of the day, I just felt worse and I was living in an extreme mess. Then I had to move and realized how bad my house got. My wonderful mother-in-law helped me scoop up the clutter last minute to put in boxes. Like literally the last day we had to move.
I definitely had postpartum depression. However since I’ve had depression my whole life, I recognized the signs and worked on helping myself. I’m experienced with my own needs and I have healthy coping mechanisms that help when my mental health declines.
However, if you think you have postpartum depression, I urge you to talk to your doctor immediately or reach out to someone in your life for help.
Postpartum depression was one of the hardest experiences I’ve had with depression, and I’ve been diagnosed with chronic depression since age 12.
*Disclaimer: Do not try to heal from depression completely alone. Always ask for help as soon as you think you may have depression.*
Eventually, once I realized I was getting depressed again, I did anything in my power to improve it.
Having a schedule as a stay-at-home mom is extremely important. As a parent, you need some sort of structure and routine. Even if that routine is not always stuck perfectly.
When I have a schedule it really helps me have some control over my life. This makes me feel fulfilled and helps me romanticize my own life.
When I have certain times designated to take care of my needs, it helps me recharge my battery and stay so much happier.
Feel free to adjust to your personal needs.
Everybody’s life is different. This post is just to be a guideline and give inspiration to stay-at-home moms. I urge you to try to try to create a routine! Just make sure to give yourself grace when you don’t stick to the schedule.
My day-to-day routine is based loosely on this schedule. In fact, my schedule is never exactly like this schedule. Every single day is different, and that’s okay! This is just a structure guideline to refer to.
I hope this stay-at-home mom schedule helps you.
Let me know how your schedule would be different below! I would love any suggestions because I’m always looking for ways to improve.
Thank you so much for reading my post! I appreciate you so much. I truly hope this post gave you inspiration.
Come be my friend!
With love,